Monday, May 31, 2010

Memorial Day and weekend update

Hey everyone! Happy Memorial Day! Thanks to all our military men and women who have served this country!

So, thank you all for your advice with the hubby! I'm glad I'm not alone in this situation. So everything ended up pretty good. :) Friday it ended up being to windy and cold for us to go hiking, so we went to play Putt Putt instead. We had a really good time trying to beat each other, and spent the entire day hanging out and talking. On Sat we finally went hiking. It was amazing! The trail took about 2 hours up and back. There is still snow up in the mountains, and most of it is melted, so there were beautiful streams and spots where we had to hike threw the packed snow. Although it was very beautiful, it is straight up the entire way, and the path is full of rocks! I thought I might just die. ;) E kept cheering me on to keep going, and I did it! My lungs were going to burst, and I thought for sure I might pass out from the elevation. But somehow I made it ok, and by the time we got to the top, I felt amazing! The way down was so much easier. I love the downhill. hahah. I am so out of shape! Even though I have been working out everyday, this mountain kicked my butt! I think it's the elevation, b/c even when we first got up there, my lungs hurt pretty bad. But we are definitely going to do this more often!
I tried to post some pics of it, but E put them in some folder that is not allowing me to put them on here. ugh! there on my FB page, but I'll try to get them on here maby tomorrow.

So Sat after the hike, we were soooo tired, But E's friend was in town and we made plans after dinner. E took me out to dinner Sat night, and while we were there, there was a family sitting next to us. They had a new baby along with a few other kids. The baby was starting to make a fuss and cry a bit, and the mom says "lets get out of here before this nice couple decides not to have any kids" And I wanted to cry. Usually I don't get that upset with kids and people who have kids, but the fact that she made this comment about people not wanting kids b/c hers is crying?? Idk. It felt awful to hear that. We told her it didn't bother us, but she insisted it did and she would leave at once so we weren't bothered! I wanted to tell her that if she didn't want a crying baby I'll take it! And I wanted to shout out that I can't have kids! It felt like after sharing such a beautiful day together, it was just thrown out the door. I tried to put it past me, but the rest of the dinner all I could think of was how lucky this family is to have those children, and I may never get that chance. I didn't tell E how I felt, but I think he could tell.

Anyway after that we met up w/ E's friend and watched the UFC fight. E's friend and his g/f stayed at our house that night and we stayed up entirely too late, and had waay to much to drink! We really don't ever go out and drink, so only after a few drinks I was feeling it! But we had a great time. The entire weekend E and I spent together talking and sharing new things. It was fantastic! I love my husband! :)

So here's a question. If I'm taking my temps do I have to use a Basal Thermometer??
Here is why I ask. I am using a Basal thermometer now, but the temps are waaayyy too low. Like the other day it showed 96.6 . E said to try the regular thermometer and it came up 97.5! E said that according to my basal thermometer I was hypothermic and about to die! lol. I tried explaining to him the importance of the basal thermometer, but he insists that it doesn't matter! And I think that he thinks this, b/c he was supposed to have bought me a basal thermometer, and got a regular one instead, and he feels bad that he got the wrong one, and since he has to be right all the time, that the regular one he bought will do what I need it to do. Does any of this make sense?? lol. I'm rambling I know. sorry!
So there is my update from the amazing weekend that I had with my wonderful hubby, who by the way decided that I need to now refer to him as BigE on my blogs! hahaha. He's crazy! :)
Oh, weight loss info: only lost 1 lb this week. totally sucks! but a lb is a lb right?? :)

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Recent Happenings

Hey all! I want to thank you for your prayers for the Scrapps! I think he might be doing better already, but it's kinda hard to tell. We will just have to wait out the week and see what happens.
Gabe's step-dad S is going into surgery right now, so hopefully that will all go ok.

Thank you for your input on the tankini! And E said I was supposed to correct myself b/c technically it is a Bandini! Whatever! lol :) And it does actually have straps that you can put on that goes around my neck. But I like it without, and I usually don't do much running around on the beach. I like to just chill and get some rays!

So yesterday E and I had our first big fight in 5 years! it was awful! And it was about nothing, I mean absolutely nothing at all! There was allot of yelling and E almost left the house. Then of course I was balling my eyes out, and we had a long talk and 10 min later it was like nothing had happened at all! We decided that we just got complacent in our relationship and that we need to do more things together. So we decided that we will go out once a week somewhere new. We will take turns deciding where to go and we figure that should give us lots new stuff to talk about and maby spice things up a bit. Do any of you have any other ideas to keep things fresh in your relationships??
It is kind of heartbreaking to know that we finally reached this point. I mean you know it will happen one day, but we weren't' like other couples. We never fight, we never get bored with each other, I mean we only hang out with each other most of the time as it is! He is my bestest friend and I do not want to ever fight like that again. I couldn't imagine not having him around.

Tomorrow we are going hiking up at Mt. Charleston, then having a picnic there. E is not that kind of guy, but I told him it would mean allot to me, so after he kicks my butt on the trails, I get to romance him with a picnic! :)

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The Tankini!

ok, so this is a very short post. E and I need some time together, I'll get into that another day, but here are the pics of the awesome tankini that I bought at Macy's :

And miss Faith makes things possible .. there is something wrong with your comment link! No one can comment, when you click to comment nothing happens! So fix it girly b/c I've been trying to comment!!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Beach Vacay postponed....

So here's the dealio.. Our Scrappy is very sick. He has been throwing up for a few weeks now on and off. He wouldn't eat anything, and most of what he drank would come back up. Our vet gave us some anti-nausea pills to see if that would help for a while, and to determine if there is an obstruction or not. We were pretty sure that it must be an obstruction, b/c that boy eats everything in sight! The pills helped out for a while and Scrappy started eating again. But then he got sick while he was on the anti-nausea pills. So we took him back to the vet again today and he said that it is not an obstruction. Now we can't do an x-ray on Scrappy because he hates going to the vet, he freaks out and won't let anyone get close to him or he tries to bite. So we could put him out and then do the x-ray, but.. we can't afford it. The vet doesn't take payment plans. So that leaves us with 2 options. The vet thinks that it is a good chance that Scrappy has tumors on his intestines. So we got some new pills to help with that to see if that is what is going on. We are to check to see how Scrappy does for a week on the pills. If Scrappy gets sick in the next few days, then the pills won't work and we will have to let him go. So we are staying home this weekend to make sure that Scrappy is ok and hopefully the pills help him.
The vet said that if he does well on the medication, then he will be able to live a normal dog life for at least another year or maybe more, while taking the medication everyday. But if he doesn't do well.. it will just be awful. But I can't stand to see Scrappy in pain anymore. Last night he was laying on me crying, and then he threw up on the bed. We have been letting him sleep with us since he's been sick b/c he loves it, and we feel so bad for him that he is hurting like this. I really don't want to let my puppy go, but I would rather that than see him in so much pain anymore. I'll keep you updated on his status, please say a prayer for Scrappy.


Well today is CD2 and I am feeling allot better. I'm doing well on my diet and keeping up with my vitamins. I started taking a multi vitamin, and per my docs orders Vit D. The D has really helped since I started taking it. I used to have so much pain in my bones. Anytime something bumped me or if someone grabbed my arm to hard, I would have this excruciating pain in my bones. I knew it wasn't normal, and luckily the doc found out I was Vit D deficient.

I can't find a pic of the swimsuit I found at Macy's so this week I'll be brave and model it for ya! It is really cute :)

Other news,...  Dancing with the stars is on tonight and I'm rooting for Nicole!

Monday, May 24, 2010

The Red Headed She Devil

Yes that *B* came today! She shows up to make my life miserable and throws my dreams out the door! Every CD1 is the same. Cramps, bloating, and feeling like a total *B* myself. My poor DH can't even be in the same room as me. It's only one day each cycle, thank goodness! But it's enough to disrupt my life.

I knew I was going to start. All the regular symptoms. But still, I always hold out hope that somehow this time just maby I'll be preggo. I just don't get it. I'm doing everything right. Eating healthy, exercising, I even lost weight this past week! I'm Down 3lbs! That should make me happy right? not today. Today I just want to sit down with a margarita, a chocolate cupcake, and a super sad movie to ball my eyes out! I hate getting like this. Is this even normal for me to get so depressed? I mean everything makes me upset. If E looks at me wrong I freak out. I just want to be a mommy already! I can't wait till the day when finally this *B* doesn't show up. Some day it has to happen right???

Well I finally got my results from my Dr about my thyroid. Last week, the system was down and then I was told that the Dr would call me back. But of course he didn't. So I called today and he is upping my meds. From 50mcg's to 75mcg's for the synthroid. Luckily they can just call it in to the pharmacy. But I will have to get my blood checked again in 6 weeks. That will be another $250.00 for that since at this time I do not have insurance. Now that I am re-starting my old job, I still have to wait the 90 days for my insurance to kick in! Ugh!

But on a brighter note, I do have this week off. I quit on Friday after lunch. I just didn't come back from lunch. It didn't feel as good as I thought it would. I always wanted to just up and leave a job that I hated. I guess because I have had 2 jobs that were absolutely horrid, and I didn't have the guts to get up and walk out. this job wasn't that bad, it sucked but I've had worse jobs. But it is nice to have this week to get the house ready for Gabe, and work on my body a little to try to get back into shape.

I did get a cute tankini on Friday. It ties in the back, so I don't feel like a total grandma at the beach! :) Well I guess that's enough grumpiness from me today here is a nice pic to temp you all! :)

About Me

I stole this from HIS & HERS INFERTILITY blog / I though it was a cute idea.

apple juice or orange juice? Orange
are you a morning or night person? No matter what time I go to sleep I'm up by 7am. So I guess that makes me a morning person!
which do you prefer, sweet or salty foods? How bout both together?
what was your favorite childhood television program? The entire TGIF lineup on friday nights! I whish they would bring that back! :) oh, and Blossom, Woah!

are you a collector of anything? books

if you could be any animal, what would you be? A Dolphin. I don't know why. I just love dolphins.

what do you usually think about right before falling asleep? What don't I think about?

what’s your favorite color? Blue

do you believe in extraterrestrials or life on other planets? Nope

do you believe in ghosts? No, ghost are scary!
ever been addicted to a video/computer game? yeah, the Sims!

you’re given 1 million dollars, what do you spend it on? pay off my mortgage, buy a bigger new home, fertility treatments, give $$ to each of my siblings to pay off their debt, and give the rest to charity

have any bad habits? Starbucks

list 3 of your worst personality traits: I giggle for no reason, especially when I'm nurvous. I'm too trusting, I don't stay in contact with people as much as I should.

have any celebrity crushes? Johnny Depp!

list 1 thing you wish you could change about yourself: I wish I could lose my belly fat!

any tattoos or piercings? 1 tat, ear pierced 3 on each side, and 1 belly button piercing.

what’s the first thing you notice in the opposite sex? Eyes

are you mostly a clean or messy person? messy

if you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? Evergreen CO

If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go? Italy

List 5 goals on your life’s to-do list:

1. Move back to Ohio
2.Have children
3.Be a better friend Europe
5.excersize more

Name 1 regrete Nothing, i wouldn't be who I am today, and I like who I am today!

name 1 thing you miss about being a kid: The simplicity of life

name 1 thing you love about being an adult: Not having homework!

what’s your favorite song of the moment? Weezer, I'm your daddy

What’s your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night? Hang out with my hubby!

what’s your favorite thing to do on a Sunday afternoon? Read a good book

Sunday, May 23, 2010


Thank you all for your prayers, I know C and S really appreciate them. Poor S is still in the hospital, he does have a small blockage. The docs want to keep him for a few more days to try some alternatives before deciding to go on with the surgery. Please keep praying for them! thanks :)

Saturday, May 22, 2010


Hey, I'm sending out a prayer request today. Gabe's (my step-son)step dad S is in the hospital. He has Crohns disease, he was diagnosed in Jan. C called and told us that he was in the hospital and they are not sure if it is just a flare up or an obstruction. If it is an obstruction then he will need surgery. C is pregnant with Gabe's first sibling, so they really need some prayers right now. Thank you all :)

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

diet update and other stuff.

Thank you gals for the support with the weight loss thing, and Jelly Belly I think the bowel prep might be the way to go! hahah!
I have read over and over again that with the PCOS you need to follow a low carb or low gi (glycemic index) diet. It sucks! I love me some bread! :)
So far the Atkins shakes that I found at Wal-Mart, are ok, and it does fill me up for breakfast with an apple. I will have some carbs at lunch to keep me going, or else I get the shakes. So just no carbs at night with dinner. Tonight we are having Salmon, with a salad, and I'll make E a potato. He is trying to gain weight. Ugh! he makes me sick! ;) jk.

I have a new DVD that I'm trying, and so far I like it! It is the Jillian Micheals
"30 Day Shred" I'll let you know how it works out for me.

Sooo. I quit my job! I hate this place where I'm at now. I know I just started 2 months ago, but it's the pitts! I got my old job back and a raise! Yesss! Technically my last day will be the 28th, but.... I'm thinking I might just leave this Friday. I could use a week off.

Monday I got my blood checked for my thyroid. I'm pretty sure I know the results. My BBT's are super low still, so my #'s aren't where they should be for a normally functioning thyroid. I forgot to call my Dr. today, and now they are closed! darn it! And since I don't have insurance right now, my Dr. said he would give talk to me about what to do next if my results weren't what he wanted, but the office staff is no bueno so we'll see how that one goes.

So I'm off to get "totally shredded!" :) Happy Hump Day!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Off with the fat!

I have 2 weeks to lose 20lbs! Ha! will never happen, but I am on a mission to get the fat gone! We are going to Newport Beach for the Memorial Day weekend. whoo hooo!
I love the beach! I love that its only a 5 hour drive for us here. Back home, it was a good 14 hour drive to the beach. That sucked!
But now I feel the pinch, the time is slowly creeping up on me, and I haven't even noticed it! I have been trying to lose weight for so long, that I wasn't on top of it as I should have been lately. I'm probably going to have to buy a new suit to cover up my belly this year. But even so, I'm on a mission to be fit this summer!
Here are a few new items I've added to my diet, to replace some of the other things I was eating.

My just for one veggies, good to round out my work lunches, and snacks when I;m hungry at home. The Special K bars are alright. It's chocolate, so I can deal with that,even though the bars are the size of a single Twix bar! And finally my Adkins shake. It is pretty gross, and gave me bad breath after I drank it, but It is pretty filling and makes for a good breakfast with some fruit.

I am ready for a relaxing weekend ahead! I sooo need this! I need to get away from my work, and the worry of getting pregnant! In 3 weeks Gabe will be here, so this is our last "free" weekend of the summer. I'm super excited for him to get here, but I will definitely need my rest to get ready for an almost 9 year old! :)

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Left Behind.

First of all I just want to say I am sooo happy for all the pg announcements out there! God is so good! :)

And although I am very happy for all my blogger friends, I can't help but to feel left out. Not only from the obvious, me not being pg, but I feel like I'm not in the same circle anymore. There have been so many announcements and everyone talking about there symptoms, or lack of symptoms, and I have nothing to say on the matter. I have nothing to respond back with. I have never been pg, even for a little bit. I have no idea what it feels like. And I want so badly to know what it feels like.

Here I am on cd20 and my temps haven't gone past 97.5 . Every day I wake up thinking that today is the day that I will ovulate! And then, nothing. My thermometer stares me back in the face with the low temp mocking me, it's saying "not today honey!" And I just want to throw it across the room.

But I have hope, still. Very little, but it is there. I keep thinking that once we move it'll happen. But that seems so silly at times. Why should that matter? And how long will it be till we actually move? Why is it taking so long? ugh!

So there is my bitch fest for today. Someone mentioned doing another prayer buddy group for all the IF girls out there, I say bring it on!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mothers Day!!!

Happy Mothers day to all you mothers, mothers to-be and wanna be mothers like me! :)

So E took me out to I-Hop today for breakfast. It was jam packed, but it was nice to go out! I had a yummy Hazelnut coffee.. ohhh it was sooo good. :)
Gabe called me today to wish me a happy mothers day. It made me a little sad and happy at the same time. It's weird being a step-mom. I know Gabe loves me, but I'm not his mother. I'm his dad's wife, and really, I'm more like a really cool aunt. I always get mixed feelings on this day.
BUT.. I don't want today to be all about how sad I am that I don't have any children of my own to call me mom.
Today is about my mom. I love my mommy. She is so great, she has always been there for me no matter what. And even though I gave her a hard time growing up, and maby she did things that I thought were a little wacky, she has always loved me and done what she thought was best for me and my sisters. She has done a tremendous job at raising all 8 of us and I am blessed to have her as a mother. :)

Mom and some sisters


my "baby"

an old pic of me and Gabe

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Low Temps, and weekend fun

Nice combo title hu? Sorry I have been MIA on the bloggs this week. It's been a long and tiresome week, but I promise to get caught up asap!
So I've decided to start charting again. E and I charted when we first got married, did the whole NFP thing. It was great, for a while. So after 2 years of charting and just being plain annoyed with the whole thing, we quit. We decided that we would let nature take its course and everything would be fine. So now here we are 2 more years later, and nothing is happening! I know that with your waking temps you can get an idea of how your thyroid is working. My temps have almost always been crazy low.
I finally bought a new thermometer, because I decided that the one I had must have been broken, because there is no way my temps could be that low unless the darn thing was broke! Welllll... I guess it wasn't broke. For a week my temps were 96.9. Am I even alive??? what is this? I'ts total craziness that they are so low. Until today I got a 97.5! whoo hooo! And fertile CM. Well maby not fertile, but you know what I mean. ;) I Almost don't even want to start charting again, but I know it will be helpful in determining what is and isn't working.
Like my thyroid. I'm not sure if the medication is doing it's thang. I mean I have not been as tired as I was, and feeling alot better, but I'm also not working such an early shift anymore. I just know my temps are too low for my thyroid to be working properly. I'll be getting some blood work done here soon, so I'll know for sure.

So this weekend is super busy for me. And I say for me because I usually don't do that much. E and I like to stay home most of the time. I did have to work this morning which was sooo boring. But then I had to go to Toys R Us. A friend of mine, M, who actually isn't even a good friend anymore, is having a birthday party for her 1 year old. I don't even know the kid, but we were friends and I'm trying on my part. After she had her baby we lost touch. I called her a few times, but she never invited me over to see her baby, so I quit calling her. Then a few months ago a mutual friend was having a baby shower, and we ran into each other there. M got all excited to see me and said she got a new phone and lost my #, but she really wanted to get together again. So A few weeks later I called to see if she wanted to meet up for lunch or something, and she couldn't' make it. That was the last I heard from her, until now. So I went out spent $35.00 on a toy,card, and wrapping paper on a kid I don't even know! I don't know why, but this irks me. Should I not be irked by this? I mean I'm going to a baby's birthday alone, with people I don't know at all. It seems kinda weird to me that she even invited me. Oh well. It's an outside party, so at least I'll get some sun!

Tonight my girlfriends and I are going out to a restaurant/bar that is partially owned by one of my good friends. It's a Croatian (sp?) restaurant. My friend Ela is from Germany, and Croatia, and there is this whole community of Croatians here. I have been there before, and hardly anyone speaks english, but the food is pretty good. We definitely should have a good time. It's been a while since we had a girls night, and I really need one! :)

So I'm going to leave you with a pic of my amazing salad I made last night. It was so good, I just had to share! The Balsamic Vinaigrette is the best!