Sunday, June 13, 2010

Love summer! :)

Today things have gotten better. Allot better. I get really frustrated that I want so bad to take care of Gabe and be a mom to him, and when things don't turn out the way I want I get really mad. I guess you could say I'm a bit of a baby. It makes me mad that I can't be the one to teach him about life, and how to act and how to learn about the Church. His mom isn't Catholic. She goes to some nondenominational church occasionally. I've tried and tried to teach Gabe about the Church, and while he's here he'll learn a little, but when he leaves and then comes back, its like he doesn't remember anything at all! His mom lets him watch movies and listen to songs that we don't approve of. She teaches him to be a different kind of person than E and I would want him to be. And its hard. E doesn't want to spend the summer nit-picking on him, but it drives me nuts! I see this innocent little boy being demoralized right in front of my face, and there is nothing I can do. I try to teach him as much as I can. I hope it is enough.

Today we went to a friends house to swim. She has 2 little boys near Gabe's age. We spent the entire day at the pool! I love it! :) I love the smell of the chlorine, and the taste of Oreo's in the sun. When I was little we lived at the local pool. We had swim team in the morning, then I had swim lessons. I'm not really sure why I had to take the lessons also, but I'm guessing its so I was kept busy so my mom could work. We spent the entire day there almost daily. I miss those days! so much fun.

Nothing new on the IF front. Same crap different day. My temps have risen a little bit this cycle though. Might be from the higher dosage for my thyroid medication. No ovulation this time.

My new PCOS Diet starts tomorrow. I'm nervous about no carbs. I have an unnatural craving for carbs I think. The more I know I can't have them, the more I want them! lol. :) We went shopping this weekend for the food for my new diet. It just stinks that I have to make 2 separate dinners for all of us though. ARRGGH! Well, wish me luck on this new diet! Hope everyone had a great Sunday! :)

1 comment:

Faith makes things possible said...

A diet with no oh man, tell me how it goes! ;)